Heart Leader

 I am blessed to have 2 brother’s that I have been very close with our entire lives.  They are identical twins three years younger than me (they are 41).  My brother Jason lives in Park Slope (Brooklyn) in New York and with families and careers is has been challenging to spend a lot of time together during the past 15+ years.   Jason’s wife & 2 kids are out of the country for a few weeks visiting friends and relatives.  Jason invited my brother Randy and I to come to NYC for a long weekend.  That “brothers weekend” happened this past weekend.  To say the least, it was magical.  The last time the three of us were together for a “brothers weekend” was in 1994.  This reunion was way overdue.

My brother Jason created a mixed CD of over 100 songs that has served as the back drop to our lives.  He played the music for Randy and I throughout the weekend.  These songs depicted our lives as kids, adolescents, young adults and adults.  The music spans songs that were recorded over the past 40+ years.  Every song created emotion in each of us.  Sometimes sad, other times happy and often we could perfectly match up the song with a memory of exactly where we were and/or who we were with.  Music can be so powerful and this gift Jason created for Randy and I is priceless.

The three of us laughed, toured NYC, spent time on Governors Island, in Central Park (where we played catch) and we took in a Mets baseball game at Citi Field.  We ate a lot of pizza (Totonno’s & Grimaldi’s are my NY favorites) and mixed in some burgers and fries from the Shake Shack.  But most of our time was spent sharing our deep feelings for one another and for expressing gratitude for the relationship we have and the power of our connection.

As I write this I have been back in Los Angeles for three days.  I am feeling a bit of sadness and depression because I don’t know when the next “brothers weekend” will be.  I am also feeling tremendous happiness as I continuously recall the memories we created together last weekend that will be a part of my life forever.

Action plan: Today’s action plan is simple but powerful beyond measure.  It is an action plan based in reconnection.  Is there someone or more than one person that you should reconnect with?  Is it a lunch or dinner or a weekend that is needed?  Is it your spouse, kids, parents, siblings or friends that you need to find that reconnection with?  Pick up the phone TODAY and call them.  Tell them you miss them and that you would like to reconnect.  I remind myself often and as I remind you today, life is short and very precious.  Don’t waste any time.  We don’t know how much we have…

Thank you for reading my blog.

If you like what you read, please ask your friends and family to log on to http://www.heartleader.com and encourage them to sign up for my free weekly blog.

You can learn more about me on my web site at http://www.darylwizelman.com

My book, Heart Leader, can be purchased by clicking the link below.

http://www.bookmasters.com/marktplc/02877.htm

Daryl

I have been blessed to know my mother in law, Rene Piemonte, for 28 years. Rene and I met in July 1982 when I met my wife Ondrea.  I was 16 years old.  Rene and I met in a nail salon where my mother worked.  Rene took Ondrea to the salon where Rene was getting her nails done.  My mom met and spoke to Ondrea and called me to the salon to meet Ondrea.  The rest is history.

For 28 years Rene has treated me like a son. She has been a second mother to me. She has celebrated my life’s victories and walked beside me through my challenges. At times she has had more confidence in me then I had in myself.  She is an amazing and beautiful person!  She is an amazing mother and grandmother.

Rene never judges me, she accepts me for who I am and she has been one of my greatest advocates for almost 30 years.  I have never heard Rene say a bad word about anyone and I have heard her use profanity only a few times in 28 years.  She is quiet and steady.  Rene is a role model in a time where there are so few.  She is a saint and a living legend.

Now Rene is 78 and with age comes some challenges.  That being said, when we are together she is present, loving, graceful and a great listener.  She is a beautiful person and she has shaped my life in so many ways. 

We never know how much time we have with the people we love. The purpose of today’s blog is to express my love for Rene in a public forum and to thank her for the love, support, confidence and loyalty she has shown me consistently for 28 years.

Action plan: Today is an opportunity for all of us to show our gratitude and love for people who have made an enormous positive impact on our lives.  My suggestion is to write them a hand written note, call them and tell them about the positive impact they have had on you or take them on a walk or out to a meal and look into their eyes and tell them how much of a difference maker they have been for you. 

Thank you for reading my blog.

If you like what you read, please ask your friends and family to log on to http://www.heartleader.com and encourage them to sign up for my free weekly blog.

You can learn more about me on my web site at http://www.darylwizelman.com

My book, Heart Leader, can be purchased by clicking the link below.

http://www.bookmasters.com/marktplc/02877.htm

Daryl

My partner, Randy, and I built United Pacific Mortgage (UPM) from a very small broker shop to a mid-sized regional retail mortgage banking operation during 17 years of hard work,good timing, taking advantage of some great opportunities, passing on some poor opportunities. We benefited by experiencing some good luck and some years where the real estate market in Southern California was growing and the demand out paced the supply.

I started at UPM in my mid-twenties and grew as a leader, manager and as a man. I am grateful and fortunate for the experience and UPM will always fill my heart with positive memories and the value of countless lessons on improving in many different areas of my life.

UPM was acquired in July 2007 and the credit crisis followed shortly thereafter. I needed a break from mortgage banking and over the past three years I have had another emotional growth spurt. I also had time to write and publish my book, Heart Leader, and to speak to many people around the country on work/life balance, corporate culture, emotional intelligence and many other topics. It has been an amazing journey.

Now it is time to return to the mortgage business. I have discovered a renewed passion and tremendous interest in recreating an amazing retail loan origination machine within a loving and dynamic corporate culture. This new opportunity will begin in July, almost three years to the date that UPM was acquired. I believe the timing is right and there are a lot of loan officers and support people who want to be with a company that really cares about them and their families.

That being said, I am also very passionate about www.darylwizelman.com and Heart Leader.  I assure you that I will continue the movement I started and I will speak to, inspire and teach every person I can in hopes of improving their lives and/or their careers.  This will never change and the journey is just at the first furlong.

Action plan: My return to mortgage banking got me thinking about challenging the readers of the Heart Leader blog to look into the past and to reflect and discover if there is something that you worked on, a job you had, a company you worked for, a career you pursued or a relationship that you had in the past that you would like to revisit and learn if the interest that was once there is still there.  I hope you will do that and I hope you tell me all about it.

Sometimes taking one step backwards enables you to take two steps forward.

Thank you for reading my blog.

If you like what you read, please ask your friends and family to log on to http://www.heartleader.com and encourage them to sign up for my free weekly blog.

You can learn more about me on my web site at http://www.darylwizelman.com

My book, Heart Leader, can be purchased by clicking the link below.

http://www.bookmasters.com/marktplc/02877.htm

Daryl

I am not a religious man however I am very spiritual.   For many years I have had the Serenity Prayer pinned to my bulletin board in my office reminding me to have faith in myself and to remind me of my limits when frustration, fear and/or anxiety enter my life.  Today I called upon the Serenity Prayer and I decided to share it with you.

God grant me the serenity

To accept the things I cannot change;

Courage to change the things I can;

And the wisdom to know the difference.

In my experience as a leader of employees, my kids, managers and others I have used this prayer to help me manage self-awareness and grace as it relates to myself and others.  There is a lot of value in taking a breath while we are under stress and/or anxious about a situation.  Time to reflect and a calm heart and mind help making even the most difficult decisions easier and with a greater sense of confidence.

Happy Holidays!

Daryl Wizelman
daryl@wizelman.com
www.darylwizelman.com

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays of the year because it has so many of us thinking about gratitude and appreciation.  What would the world be like if we felt and expressed gratitude and appreciation every day?  I refer to this as “The Thanksgiving Mindset.”  Simply explained through being kind, showing gratitude and being appreciative for all of the amazing people and opportunities we have in our lives.

Life is very busy and we are all juggling a million balls.  Sometimes it is easy to forget to say “thank you” or “I love you.”  If we adopt the Thanksgiving Mindset, we can further a movement of making our world a kinder and more grateful world through our words and actions.  I believe that this can be spread from person to person and eventually can change our culture and the way we think and interact.  I agree that this seems like a lofty goal.  But where is the harm in each one of us trying to be kinder and more grateful?  Each one of us has so much to give!

A few questions I ask myself?

1.   Do I take enough time to reflect on who and what is most important to me?
2.   Do I express gratitude for the large and small blessings in my life?
3.   Do I express gratitude to the people who I love and manage/lead?
4.   Do I appreciate and show gratitude for the little things in life that people do for me?
5.   Do I consider others?
6.   On a daily basis I ask myself, have I done the most to maximize The Thanksgiving Mindset in every situation I was in today?

I hope this blog and the entries that will follow will inspire thought and action.

Happy Thanksgiving.